First of all let me say I'm sorry for your loss. Travel, especially to a foreign country, can be stressful enough but add to that travel due to a death in the family and it's easily doubly stressful.
That being said, Continental's bereavement only provides a 10% discount on fares booked directly through them either on the phone or on Continental.com. I know this since I traveled to my father's funeral last year and dealt with Continental. Since you said the difference on Orbitz was about $300 dollars then you probably got a better fare than Continental could have given you directly unless the tickets were more than $3000 each.
Since you never made it to Mexico because of the weather, you should receive a full refund as this is what's known as a "trip in vain." You began your trip to the connecting hub but were delayed there beyond when you needed to be at your destination so you went back to where you started. Same thing happens sometimes when people are traveling to business meetings, family reunions, cruises, concerts, etc. You should first contact Orbitz customer service and explain that because of the weather delays it was a trip in vain and request a refund. If they don't budge then call Continental. Tell them Orbitz refused to help you and that you want a refund due to the fact that weather caused the cancellation of your flight to Mexico and it turned into a trip in vain.
I know you were frustrated and stressed over the whole situation but losing your cool and escalating things into a fight with the employees at Houston certainly did not work in your favor and I'm sure that's why you didn't get any sympathy from the employees there. I'm sure there are remarks in your reservation about what happened. When you call Orbitz and/or Continental please remain calm and be professional. As soon as you lose it you won't get any further. It may already be too late but it's worth a try.
As for the hotel it is rare that a US airline will give a free hotel when there are weather cancellations. Even as an elite on Continental in cases of weather the only thing I've received is a "distressed passenger discount" voucher which gives about the same discount for a hotel room as AAA. Mars it would be nice if the airlines would make special considerations but where would they draw the line? And how could they prove they were actually flying for a funeral? To get the discount you need to send in a copy of the death certificate to Continental's refund department. It's very rare that someone traveling to a funeral would already have a copy of the death certificate.
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