I wouldn't pay them extra. As you said eluded, this is the exception. Even if/when couples or families are split, if you go to the gate and ask the agent to see what they can do, in my experience, the majority of requests are able to be completed.
I wouldn't give more money to these crooks only to have the same thing happen again. I left the airline biz about the time they started introducing the pay extra for your seat thing and I haven't been in an airport since so I don't know if they can play with those or not. My guess is yes and they'll have some lame excuse for doing so.
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