[jimworcs]

We may not agree on this, but ...

a. they refused to offer me any alternative, or let me fly, and just took our names off the computer, offloaded our bags without telling us (which I saw on the screen by looking over their shoulders), and just walked away. So they do have to account for their behaviour.

I agree. I say in my post they do need to account for their behaviour. Unless they have a reason, their conduct is outrageous.nthis is why I asked the question as to whether there were any other reasons.

b. they were negligent in not notifying us at check-in when they scanned the passports, which would have allowed us to make alternatives

An error was made by BA at check in, in not noticing the passport expiry date. You had also made the same error, in booking the tickets and not checking the expiry dates of the passport.

c. your point about the security of bags is wrong because i. the bomb was discovered prior to departure, ii. all the bags had passed through security and iii. we all intended to fly, rather than jump ship as in the case of the El Al bomber.

My point regarding security is not wrong. When a family group check in luggage, the pairing rules apply. Your intent to fly is irrelevant. I have a friend who is a captain, who offloaded a passenger who was abusive to a FA on a flight from Spain. He had no discretion whatsoever in company SOPS but to also offload their companion and their cases. I simply offer it as a possible explanation for the policy, not to suggest is fair.

d. my daughter flew with us the following day on the same passport with EL AL (who could be more security obsessed than Israel's national carrier?), who found it difficult to comprehend the BA staff's callous behaviour towards a young family.

The fact that El Al were willing to take the risk is irrelevant. Airline policies diifer significantly. It is often the case that the national airline will have lines of communication with immigration authorities for example that other carriers may not have.

Believe or not, I am on your side. It sounds to me like you were badly treated... But complaining is an art. If you take a moderate approach, which acknowledges some of the complexities and nuances of this case you are far more likely to get a remedy. A lifelong ban is a very severe sanction and can impact you for years to come.

I know you have interpreted their suggestion of going to Tesco to get food for the baby as an example of heartlessness. I am not sure this is was the intent. You complain you had no food for the kids. There is in fact a 24 hr Tesco not far from the airport, no more than 10 minutes by taxi. This may just have been a practical solution the one of your concerns, but came across in your heightened emotional stare as callous.

The police actions don't necessarily substantiate your point that yiur own actions were blameless. I am not saying they were or were not, only that you should assess if this could be a factor. The airport police deal with people in situations like this every day. People behave differently when they are stressed and upset and the police ave a wide lattitude of discretion. Their lack of action doesnt imply you were blameless.