[Infrequent Traveller]

I had 2-leg flight Newark-Chicago-Beijing scheduled for 06/22. The Newark-Chicago flight was postponed (due to a storm in Chicago) by so long that it missed the connecting flight. I was re-scheduled for two days later (they said the next day 06/23 was full) without seats. I called AA to get seat assignment. Since my scheduled flight only has a buffer of 45 minutes, I asked them if they can move me up to an earlier flight (with posted available seats). The rep told me they have to charge a fee for it because I already agreed at the airport to take the scheduled one (at that time, I did not know I had other options). My loss includes 2 days vacation time, 1 extra vacation day of my friend (she has to make 2 extra trips to the airport on two different dates), 2 extra trips (130 miles each), among other re-scheduling headache. In this situation, I wonder what kind of recourse I have? What can/should I do?
In my opinion, nobody should take AA going forward.
1. They don't tell you until the very last moment. The storm happened more than 10 hours before my flight time. They know the aiport was a mess. Yet their website kept saying "ON TIME" until my boarding time so that we cannot make contigency arrangement before leaving for airport.
2. We arrived at the airport 3 hours ahead of time. No more than 15 families were in the line for check-in. It took us a solid hour to get to the counter.
3. AA people are not interested in talking to you. When I learnt of the delay, I went to ask. A lady behind the counter gave a gesture like "one monent". She did her stuff, turned around and left with returning. Another gentleman did basically the same thing. I was the only one at the counter and he pretended I was not there.
4. AA people don't care what happened to you. Whoever I talked to, told me the trouble is weather related and AA is not liable for it.